TAA080 Emotional Intelligence and Processing Pain

Emotional Intelligence and Processing Pain

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Processing Your Pain with Emotional Intelligence

n2 friends Mike and Christian passed away this week.nnProcessing Grief not just for them, but for what could have been.nnIf we can learn to change our relationship with pain, we don’t need these things anymorennIf we can learn to be ok with suffering and not reject ourselves and run away, we can keep our hearts open and move on.nnI know it hurts.nnBut on the other side there is joy, freedom, love, and there might be more pain, but I promise it’s not forever.nnYou are a gift to this world.nnThe pain will pass and you’ll find on the other side you understand yourself more once you go through it.nnIf it’s still difficult, place your hand on your heart and acknowledge your pain.nnI am here.
 This pain is important.
 I am willing to feel it.nSoften and allow it to pass.nYour pain is not you.nYour addiction is not you.nYou are a light in the world.nGo illuminate.n

Emotional Intelligence

nBeing able to hold space for different personality typesnnVictim-hood can be defined by the three positions beautifully outlined in a diagram developed by a well respected psychiatrist, and teacher of Transactional Analysis, named Stephen Karpman. He calls it the “Drama Triangle,” I refer to it as the victim triangle. Having discovered this resource some thirty years ago, it has become one of the more important tools in my personal and professional life. The more I teach and apply the victim triangle to a relationship the deeper my appreciation grows for this simple, powerfully accurate instrument.nnLiving in reality requires truth. To tell the truth, we first must first know what it is. When we react out of denied feelings and unconscious programming, we cannot possibly know our personal truth. This means we will not be in touch with reality. There will be hidden agendas and dishonesty. This is another primary trait of all players on the triangle. Only by knowing our truth, can we begin to speak from a place of personal integrity. Then exiting the triangle becomes possible.

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